


A Dream Is A Wish Your Heart Makes

by Small_Town_Wayward_Daughter



Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: Angst, Chibs is kind of a dick, F/M, He gets better, I Love To Cuss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-09
Updated: 2016-07-09
Packaged: 2018-07-22 11:06:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7434497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Small_Town_Wayward_Daughter/pseuds/Small_Town_Wayward_Daughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chibs breaks up with you, leaving you to fend for yourself alone, He comes back to find some surprising new developments.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like it and as always thank you for reading! <3

Things in SAMCRO had been rough lately, Half Sack was dead, Jax's son Abel had been kidnapped and the guys had gone to find him. I was a crow eater for the Sons, well I used to be, I was Chibs Telford's unofficial old lady. Which meant I was a crow eater but only Chibs got to be with me and I was fine with that. Jimmy O had really screwed Chibs over, he had scarred his face and stolen away his wife and daughter. I was always fine with Chibs never committing because I knew that he loved me. He always took good care of me and I tried to return the favor as much as I could. I was holding down the fort while the guys were in Belfast but I knew that things were going to be different when they got back. The guys had jumped bail and sneaked out of the country and that was not going to be without consequence when they got back. Chibs had told me that they were going to jail and he knew that I was mad about it, he was punishing me for getting upset because he hadn't called to check in like he normally would. I was upset because the day before Abel was taken I had found out that I was pregnant. I was waiting to tell him until things calmed down, he had enough on his plate without adding that to it. Gemma had called me this morning to tell me that they would be back tomorrow and that Abel was safe and I was excited, I missed my man and my friends. She said that Chibs had had it out with Jimmy and that he was in a state but that he didn't want to talk about it. I understood, he was private about stuff like that.   
Gemma had taken me in a while back when she found me living on the streets, she said she liked my 'sassy country girl attitude.' I was born and raised in Arkansas and you could definitely tell especially when I was feeling emotional. I had fallen for Chibs pretty quick but kept my distance from all the guys like Gemma had told me too, until Clay let it slip that Chibs wanted me to 'ride him like his Harley' that was a year ago. It was late so I closed up TM and made sure that the office was locked tight as well as the gates before I left. I went by the store before I went back to Chibs' house so that I could cook something nice for Chibs when he got back, he had asked me to move in with him a few months ago but it didn't feel like home yet. I knew that I was expendable but I hoped that once he found out about the baby he would be excited and that would make me feel secure. I fell asleep early that night since I didn't have to work, I was a dancer at a lounge and when I woke up my phone was ringing.   
"Hello?"  
'Hey, can you go to TM and unlock the gates, were gonna be back soon.' _Chibs!_  
"Hi babe, yeah I'll head over now, how wa-"  
'Great.' He hung up _Oh, guess he's still mad at me._ I frowned and went to get dressed. I was still at TM an hour later when they all pulled in and I stepped outside to greet them. I got hugged from Juice, Tiggy, Jax and Gemma. Clay smiled and rubbed my hair while Chibs just ignored me until they went inside.   
"You shoulda gone back home after you opened the gates."  
"I- I wasn't supposed to leave the place unattended Chibs. Gemma said so." He just gave me a look. "I thought maybe you'd be happy to see me?" I muttered and he scoffed.   
"I didn't call ya for a reason, I needed some space from ya." I just looked at the ground   
"I knew that you were mad at how I reacted about you going to jail but that's only because-"  
"It doesn't matter, nothing you say is gonna change the fact that I was right about ya!" _Ouch_  
"Nothing? Right about what Chibs?"  
"No fuckin nothing. I was right to not commit to ya, you aren't strong enough to be an old lady F/N. The time that I'm inside will give you time to move on and move _out_. I don't want you living in my house when I get out, don't visit and don't fucking write. We're done." I felt like he punched a hole through my chest.   
"If that's what you want Chibs, I'm sorry that I made you that angry." I mumbled before I went to get my bag from the office.   
"What's wrong baby?" Gemma asked and Jax looked up from the computer.   
"Uh, Nothing, I gotta go Gem." I started to feel my eyes water and I knew that I had to go. I wasn't gonna let Chibs see me cry. "I'll be out in an hour if you can wait that long to go back to your house." I told him in a numb voice.   
"Ya don't gotta go now."  
"You wanted me gone Chibs, I am not gonna _force_ my presence on you when it's clearly unwanted." I didn't look at him as I got in my car and drove away. I was at his house in a few minutes and started packing. I only took what I brought with me when I moved in, what I knew was mine. I left the things he had bought me, and the pictures that we had taken together, I also made sure not to take any of his clothes or books. A clean break was needed and I couldn't do that with memories of his around. I was gone within twenty minutes and I had gone to my old landlord to see if she had anything open, she did a small one bedroom that would work for me and the baby, It was almost passed the city limits but it was in a safe neighborhood and fully furnished so I was glad for it. I knew that I had a long road ahead of me, being a single parent was going to be hard but I knew that I could do it. Cutting ties from SAMCRO however was going to be the hardest thing about this mess, Gemma, Jax, Juice, and Tig were my family. _Expendable F/N don't forget that._ I cleaned the whole house and then went to shower before I had to go to work. I knew that I would grieve and weep when I got home and went to bed alone, without Chibs, but now was not the time.


	2. Chapter 2

I had never done well by myself, that is how I ended up homeless and in Charming to begin with, I followed a loser here and he bailed on me, However after three long months of morning sickness and wishing that I had someone to help me, then realizing that I was well and truly alone I felt stronger than ever. I was a fucking warrior princess and I could do whatever I fucking wanted to **all by my-goddamn-self!** I didn't need anyone to pay my bills, to hold my hair, to hold my hand at ultrasound appointments, and I certainly didn't need a man to keep me warm at night. I was fine and I was gonna make my baby proud that I did all that I could, all by myself.  
  
I was five months along and I was excited because today was the day I found out whether my little bump was a boy or a girl! Then I had to go buy myself some new clothes because nothing I had fit anymore. I hated the waiting room at my OB-GYN's office, it was full of posters with men and women holding their babies together, and signs that made being a single parent an inadequacy, I looked around and saw that there was only one set of people here with me today, a teenage girl that looked terrified and a seriously pissed off woman that I assumed was her mother. I gave the girl a small smile and she looked at her mom before she gave me one back. The nurse poked her head out the door and called out my name, I stood and followed her into the back. She had seen me around at each of my appointments and always asked how I was, she knew that I had struggled through the first few months and had given me tips to help me be less nauseous at work. She escorted me to my exam room and just told me to get on the table since I had worn a dress I wouldn't need to change. My doctor joined me about fifteen minutes later and we went through the routine questions before she started the ultrasound. She said that my baby looked perfectly healthy and was growing properly and asked if I wanted to know what I was having. I said of course and she told me that I was having a baby girl. _A girl!_ I put a hand to my belly and felt her nudge me with her foot. The doctor left and let me clean up and adjust to the news in peace.  
  
I was seven months along now and was putting the finishing touches on the baby side of the room, I had bought all the baby furniture and had my landlord's husband come and help me put it together since my belly left me pretty much limited where mobility came into account. The furniture was all dark wood and matching, the bedding was done in pastel purples and pinks and the mobile had little purple jungle creatures. I hung a pink and blue dream catcher over the crib and I hoped that all her dreams would be happy. **A dream is a wish your heart makes, and sometimes your head doesn't tell you that your dream will end up tearing you apart.** I had been having nightmares about Chibs lately, that he got released from prison and found out about the baby, the end was always different, either he didn't give a shit. _Which I thought was totally likely_ Or he tried to take her from me. _I'd kill him before I'd let him have her._ I shook off those thoughts and went to start putting her new clothes in the dresser. I bought her quite a few outfits, pajamas, shoes, booties, socks, hats, sleepers, and plenty of blankets. I had the changing table stocked with wipes, diapers, powders, and diaper rash cream. My doctor had warned me about nesting and I was already aware that I was becoming obsessive but I wanted to be prepared. A few of my friends from work had pitched in and got me a car seat, stroller, and a monogrammed diaper bag that read Aila (pronounced Eye-La). Aila Nicole L/N was the name I had chosen for my daughter and it had taken me about a week of looking to find the perfect one. I didn't want her to be named something plain or that had a terrible meaning behind it.  
  
"Ow!" I sat up and gasped in pain, my bed was soaked and I had a shooting pain in my back and stomach. _Fuck!_ I took a deep breath and pulled out my phone to call the hospital, it was definitely baby time. After I hung up I got out of bed, changed into dry clothes, grabbed the baby bag and drove myself to the hospital. My doctor would shit herself when she found out, but I had no one else to take me. It was dark and that's when I realized that it was only 2 in the morning. "Couldn't wait till morning huh baby girl?" I talked to my belly and laughed when she nudged me. I made it to the hospital and parked just as another contraction came and I decided that maybe labor was gonna suck worse than I thought. I shuffled into the entrance and up to the desk to get admitted and I recognized Tara Jax's old lady talking with a nurse. She saw me and narrowed her eyes I turned my back on her and looked at the admitting nurse as another contraction hit me. "Jesus Christ on a cracker!" I heard my southern accent coming out thick and knew that I was getting upset.   
"F/N?" _Shit!_ I turned and eyed Tara warily. "I thought it was you, you're pregnant?"  
"Not for long." I gasped and held my stomach.   
"Does-"  
"No, and it's not his business. He kicked me out before he went to jail and made sure that I knew I was nothing to him. He never even let me tell him." She sighed and shook her head as the nurse wheeled a wheel chair up to me. "Don't tell anyone Tara please. I'm not a crow eater anymore. I'm alone and that's fine with me. _Please_."  
"I won't say anything, I don't blame you for wanting to keep it to yourself. I wish you the best of luck and your-" she broke off and nodded at my belly.   
"Daughter. Aila." I told her and she smiled as I got wheeled away. My OB-GYN dashed down the hall to meet me and smiled when she saw me.   
"Couldn't wait huh? You're three days until full term though so that's really great." I smiled and she helped me onto the bed as another contraction came over me. She coached me through the whole four hours of labor and told me that I was so strong. A part of me in a weak moment wished that Chibs was there to hold my hand and to cut the cord but even if we were still together, he was in jail and wouldn't have been able too anyway. I cried when I got to hold her, happy tears because she was so beautiful. She looked like a wet pink potato but I loved her and she was a perfect pink potato. She had a set of lungs on her and she cried out with her unhappiness of this new strange place. I smiled because I knew that she would be just fine. When they took her to get cleaned up I allowed myself a few tears of sadness for Aila and that father that didn't know about her and for me for the man that didn't want me. I filled out her birth certificate and left the father's name line blank. The nurse took pictures of us when they brought her back to me and Tara stopped by before we left to bring Aila a small bear and a soft pink blanket with the Son's Reaper on it.   
"She should have something from her other half, I had this made when Jax asked me to be his old lady for if I ever had a daughter, but I think it will be good for her." I nodded and she smiled before she left.  
  
Aila was a great baby, now that she was 5 months she was sleeping through the night, she was rolling over from her back to her stomach and rocking, I knew she would start crawling soon, she pulled things closer to her and often took her bottles so that she could hold them instead of me. Aila was starting to babble more clearly as well, she said mama the other day but I knew that was just from me saying it not that she knew it meant me. I played music for her and sang to her all the time because she loved it. I decided that I was gonna baby proof the house while she napped and was in the middle of making that list when my phone started ringing.   
"Hello?"  
"F/N?"  
"Yeah, who's this?"  
"It's Tara, um just a heads up, they are out."   
"Oh." _Shit!_  
"He doesn't think anything and I didn't say anything but I thought you should know."   
"Thank you." I heard a male voice in the back round "Is that Jax?"  
"Yes that's right."   
"Thanks again! Bye Tara!" I hung up and went to scoop Aila up off the floor. I still had those nightmares about Chibs, even though I there was no documentation that she was his. _She isn't his._ She's **mine**. I took her to our room so that I could sing and rock her to sleep.  
I left my home still as a child  
I walked a thousand sorry miles  
To wait for my father, to gather up his truth  
He said my boy you've got to run  
Don't wait for me, don't wait for mum  
We'll come get you, when it's safe for us to move  
So I waited many years,  
Held back the pain behind my tears  
For my father, to come find me like he said  
And in that time I was alone,  
So many years without my home  
I made brothers of a different kind instead  
And in the time I didn't know,  
Just how hard the wind could blow  
Towards disaster, and the things that I would see  
I never found my father,  
I never found my mother  
Even would I know in my lifetime I will be  
A hero into the masses,  
To those born without chances  
There's a freedom that everyone deserves  
I know there's greed and there's corruption  
I've seen death and mass destruction  
But I'm telling you, and I hope that I'm heard  
And I will not be commanded,  
And I will not be controlled  
And I will not let my future go on,  
Without the help of my soul  
And I will not be commanded,  
And I will not be controlled  
And I will not let my future go on,  
without the help of my soul  
And I will not be commanded,  
And I will not be controlled  
And I will not let my future go on,  
without the help of my soul  
I will not be commanded,  
I will not be controlled  
And I will not let my future go on,  
Without the help of my soul  
I set my sleeping daughter in her crib and I went to make my home safe for her. No matter what would come, she would always be safe with me and I would make sure that she would always have me to count on.  
  
  
Aila was six months now, she was crawling and knew that I was mama, she called out for me when she needed me or couldn't see me and the first time it happened my heart soared. I loved her more than anything and I was glad that she knew who I was. She was eating lunch in her high chair when the door bell rang. I wiped my hands on a rag and went to answer it, leaving her in the kitchen. I felt all the color drain out of my face when I opened the door.   
"What the fuck are you doing here?"   
"Came to see ya love, missed ya." I scoffed and rolled my eyes at him.   
"Cut the shit Chibs. What do you want?" I glared at him and his eye brows went up in surprise.   
"MAMA!" I heard a small crash Aila scream and I ran back inside forgetting about Chibs. She had knocked her bowl and cup off the high chair but she was fine except that she got startled by the noise. "mama mama mama" She cried as I rushed to scoop her up.  
"Shh baby girl it's ok. Shh." I rocked her and turned to take her to the living room when I froze. _Chibs_ He was standing in my kitchen staring at my daughter and I knew just what he was seeing. His hair, my eyes, his face, his long build, he was seeing his daughter for the first time and he looked terrified and pissed off.


	3. Chapter 3

He was still staring and I just sighed as I brushed past him, he turned so that his eyes could follow her and she waved her hands at him.   
"You babysit now?"   
"Would a kid that I babysat call me mama?" I turned and gave him a look.   
"She's yours?" I nodded "She's mine?"   
"Only genetically." I said in a bitter, cold tone.  
"Were you gonna tell me?"   
"I tried to tell you! You didn't want to listen to what I had to say if you'll remember correctly? 'It doesn't matter, nothing you say is gonna change the fact that I was right about ya!' " I mimicked him and he stepped closer to me and I backed up a step. He ran his hands through his hair and then dropped them to his sides.  
"That's not fair, I thought you were gonna say sorry or that you loved me."   
"I was! I did! I was also pregnant with her!"  
"You shoulda told me anyway F/N!"  
"Don't yell at me in front of her Chibs, You'll scare her." I rocked her gently and turned my back on him so that I could reign in my emotions. Part of my heart was soaring because he was here! the rest of me was terrified because he was here.   
"How old is she?"   
"Six months." I turned back and he was right behind me. Aila cooed and waved her hands at him again he stared at her and she gave him the same look.   
"What's her name?" I sighed   
"Aila Nicole" His eyes jumped to mine and he smiled   
"Scottish, from a strong or resilient place. You have high hopes for her."  
"I want her to be stronger than me. I want her to know her own strength before she has to use it." He nodded and I noticed that she was falling asleep. "It's time for her nap, you know the way out." I told him and I turned my back on him again. I changed her into clean clothes and set her gently in her crib. I kissed her gently and brought the baby monitor out with me so that I could hear her while I cleaned up her lunch mess. I jumped when I saw that Chibs was still standing where I left him. "Why are you still here?"   
"I can't just leave. We have things to discuss."  
"We sure as hell don't Chibs. You said everything you needed to say 14 months ago and that hasn't changed." I went in to the kitchen and he followed me.   
"Everything has changed F/N, I have a daughter and I only said tho-"  
" _You_ have nothing Chibs Telford. Aila is mine, she had no father according to her birth certificate and she has my last name." He stepped closer to me and this time I stood my ground.   
"You know that's not really you talking, that's the anger because I hurt your feelings all those months ago-" I slapped him. Hard.   
"Fuck you Chibs, you didn't 'hurt my feelings' you broke my heart and kicked me out of the only stable home i'd ever had. You made me leave my family, my friends, and you-" I let out a bitter laugh. "You ripped my fuckin' heart out and kicked me to the curb like I meant nothing to you even though I loved you with my whole heart."  
"If you'll let me explain-"  
"It doesn't matter. Nothing you can say will change the fac-" He clapped his hand over my mouth. He looked livid and I felt my inner facade quake a little bit.  
"My turn F/N. Shh." His eyes were on fire "Yes I was mad when we left for Belfast, but I knew that you would be fine. Until Jimmy O showed me pictures of you and said that you would make a nice edition to his side pieces. He threatened to kidnap you and to use you in terrible ways F/N. I knew that if I was in jail I couldn't protect you and I hoped that you would leave town if I hurt you enough." I pulled away from him and shook my head. I didn't believe him.   
"You're lying." I kept shaking my head and he stepped closer to me again, he ran his hand down my arm and took my hand in his.   
"I'm not. Was I ever mean to you love? Did I ever once treat you like that before no matter how mad or riled up I was?" I didn't say or do anything and a small bubble of hope bloomed in my chest. "I love you F/N. I always have and that never changed. I said what I said because I wanted to keep you safe. I got out, solved my Jimmy O problem and came to find you, to bring you home with me. Why else would I be here?" I shrugged and he smiled softly, I knew that he wanted to kiss me but I just shook my head and felt my eyes water. I wanted _so badly_ to believe him.  
"I can't. Chibs I can't." I tried to pull away from him and he just shook his head as he pulled me into his arms.  
"Why not?"  
"You broke my heart Chibs, how can I ever trust you again?"   
"I'll spend the rest of my life proving it to you F/N. Just give me a chance please?" I looked at him and saw that his eyes were serious.   
"I'll give you a chance, but I'm not moving out of here, and I'm only doing this for Aila. She deserves to know her father. I don't know about you and me yet, that will take some thinking on and a lot of time."   
"Will you tell me about her? What she likes?" I nodded and smiled at him. I told him her birthday, about the pregnancy, the height and weight she was when she was born, her favorite foods, toy, blanket, word, and everything there was to know about her. I showed him all the pictures and videos that I had of her and then she woke up from her nap so I went to get her. He stared at her again and I held her out to him.   
"Wanna hold her." He blanched and looked terrified before I handed her over to him. "She wont break Chibs, she's a tough one." She smacked him with her fist and I laughed. He smiled and held her against him, she looked just like him. She put her hand on his face and leaned in to blow a raspberry on his cheek, He jumped and I laughed. "She kissed you, she likes you." He fuckin beamed and looked at her.   
"I like you too pretty baby." He kissed her head and I left them alone to bond since I still hadn't cleaned the kitchen. I spent that time thinking, how was I feeling about him being here? _Fucking stoked._ About seeing him with Aila? _It warmed my heart because I knew he loved her already._ How did I feel about him? _I loved him still even if I didn't fuckin want to._ Did I believe what he said about Jimmy O? _Of course I did._ Was I ready to let him back into my heart? _Not yet, but I would be in time._ He came in a little while later with her and she yelled out at me.  
"MAMA mama mama mama" She chanted when she saw me and I smiled at her.   
"Yes love?"   
"Ba!" I smiled and handed her her shiny ball that rattled. She gave me a gummy grin and shook it at Chibs like 'Hey check this out!' He was giving me a strange look.  
"What?"   
"You carried her, gave birth to her, and have raised her this far alone. How can you let me in when I left you?" I sighed.   
"I've been thinking about that and I realized that... I love you, that wont change even if I was mad at you for the last year. It's not fair to keep you from her when you want to be around her and you won't be a bad father to her. If for a second I doubted that I would have kicked you out a long time ago but I know you. You can be kind and gentle when you want to be, but you can be protective and ruthless too which is a good trait to have in the father of your child. I'm not saying you and I will be the same but we can at least be civil for her." I ran my hand over her head and he nodded.   
"I want you both, I'll do whatever it takes to make that happen." I nodded and his phone started to ring so he handed me Aila and answered it. "I have to go, but can I come back?" I nodded and went to write down my cell for him.   
"If you come around and we're not here, give me a call." He nodded and wrote his number down on the other half of that paper.   
"Call me if you need _anything_ No matter what time." I nodded and he kissed Aila on the head gave me a look and left. I looked at Aila and she just started at me, I took her to the living room and set her in her play pen so that I could clean up the place. Her toys were scattered around and I had a mountain of laundry to finish before dinner and work. I figured I'd cross the 'new job' bridge when I got to it, I knew he wouldn't like it. I finally got everything done, Aila was fed, bathed and in bed, and the sitter showed up right on time so I could get to work. I was exhausted from the stress of the day but bed time would have to wait, I had a show to put on.  
  
I was off at 6 the next morning, I woke Aila up at 7 and we had breakfast before play time. We played and danced and she tried standing up until lunch time at 11 then we took a nap together. My phone woke me up at 4 that evening. "Hello?"   
"F/N?"  
"Chibs?" I was half asleep still and I knew he heard it.   
"Did I wake ya?"   
"I was catching a nap with Aila, I worked all night so no sleep until she did." I muttered "What's up?"  
"Uh was wondering if I could come by and see her?"   
"Sure." He gave a long pause. "You're here aren't you? He chuckled and I went to get the door. He gaped at me and I remembered that I had on shorts and a sports bra. "Oops. Be right back." I left him in the living room and I went to put on a shirt and grab Aila. She was sitting up and staring at me with 'where'd you go?' eyes.   
"You're uh new friend is here baby." We had to talk about that, about if he wanted to be Dada or not. I lugged her out to the living room and she giggled and yelled out while she waved her arms at him. He grinned and reached out to take her from me.   
"Hi my baby!" He kissed her and she tugged his hair. I went into the kitchen to get a drink and he followed me. "What kinda job do ya have that keeps you up all night?" I swallowed my sip of soda and looked him dead in the eye.   
"I am an exotic dancer five nights a week." He blinked but nodded.   
"Make good money?" I nodded and waited for his brain to catch up. "Who uh watches Aila?"   
"A babysitter." He nodded again   
"I-I could watch her if you wanted sometime?" I smiled softly and nodded.   
"I think that would be good for both of you. Maybe next time my baby sitter can't make it." He smiled. "Are you hungry? Its getting to be dinner time."   
"Oh uh, I don't wanna-"  
"Chibs it's food, not like I asked you for a quickie. Stop acting weird." He laughed and nodded before he stepped closer to me.   
"Fair enough." He wrapped his hand around the back of my neck and tugged my face to his.  
"That's not what I-"  
"You told me to stop acting weird. Not kissing you is weird for me love." He told me before he pressed his lips to mine in a deep kiss.


	4. Chapter 4

Kissing Chibs was just as I remembered it kind, passionate and full of love, even when Aila smacked him with her hand. He pulled back and laughed at her "Alright little one I get it. Your Mama, Dada gets it." I looked at him.  
"Dada?" He looked wearily at me and nodded.   
"If you don't mind?" I just nodded. "You sure?" I nodded again and he grinned. "How about that kissing thing did ya mind that?" _Ah there was the cocky Chibs I knew._ I gave him a look and turned back to the stove. I was making spaghetti, Aila _loved_ spaghetti. "Is she walking yet?"   
"Not yet, she can stand a little on her own but her legs aren't that sturdy yet. I'd give her another month or two and she'll have me running for my money.   
"I missed all this stuff with Kerrianne." He muttered and I turned to him, I hadn't even thought about that.  
"Don't worry, soon enough she'll be calling you Dada and running up to say hi when you come visit." I tried to make him feel better but he just looked irritated.   
"She should live with me, you both should then I wouldn't have to come visit." I set down the spoon I was holding and looked at him.   
"You've known of her for two days Chibs, I told you I'd need time." I tried to reason and he just scoffed.   
"Time for what? I told you what happened and you understood." He snapped and I glared at him.  
"I spent over a year hating you for abandoning me Chibs, a year thinking that I wasn't good enough for you, that I was worthless and that I did something to make you stop loving me. That doesn't just go away because you tell me a nice story. Even if it is the truth. I am trying! I told you you could see her and spend all the time you wanted with her and it's still not enough for you." I sighed and ran a hand through my hair as he looked at the ground. Aila started to fuss and reached out for me. "Rock her side to side, and rub her back." I told him and he looked startled before he complied. She settled after a few minutes and I looked at him. "Now you know what to do when she feels our stress." I turned back to the stove and took a few deep breaths.   
"I'm sorry." I shrugged and he stepped closer to me. "I'm just afraid that each time I leave you'll change your mind and be gone when I return." I shook my head at him.   
"I wouldn't do that to you or to her. I just have a lot of feelings to get over. I know you told me the truth but I'm scared that you'll show up and leave again and this time I won't be the only one effected. If you decide you don't want me fine, but I swear to God if you abandon her like that I will cut off your balls."  
"F/N look at me." I turned and looked at him. "I'm not your father, I'm not gonna do that to her or to you. I promise love." I nodded and he smiled at me.  
  
Chibs, Aila, and I ate dinner, Chibs wore most of Aila's because he wanted to feed her. They both washed up and Chibs put her to bed while I changed for work and I asked him to answer the door for the babysitter while I finished up. I came out and he was standing outside the bathroom door with his arms crossed and Chase my babysitter was livid in the living room. "What's up guys?"   
"Ya never told me the 'babysitter' was a man." I looked at him and shrugged.   
"Who's the angry Scott F/N?" Chase asked me in an affronted tone.   
"Aila's father that's who I am." I grimaced and looked at Chase.   
"This is Chibs, Chibs, this is Chase. Be fuckin polite to him Chibs. He is a baby whisperer." I glared and he scoffed at me. "I'm sorry Chase he is new at the daddy thing and is being a dick about it." He smiled gently and nodded at me. "Chibs lets go. Now." I grabbed my bag and his arm and tugged him outside.   
"I'm not leaving her with him all alone!" He whisper- yelled at me and I whipped around to face him.   
"I had Chief Hale run a very good back round check on him and he is as innocent as she is so bite me, I wouldn't leave her with someone untrustworthy!" I fumed at him and he just stared at me.   
"I-I'm sorry." He sighed and I just rubbed my head.   
"I have to go, I can't be late for work. Go home, she's fine I swear." I told him in a resigned tone as I got into my car and closed the door. There were flowers on my table when I got home and Chase was smiling at me. "What?" He handed me the card, gave me a hug and went home. 'I'm sorry I was an asshole, please don't hold it against me, I'm new at this. Love, Your Scottish Idiot. I grinned and pulled out my phone to call him he answered sounding half asleep.  
'Hello?'  
"Wanna come feed your daughter some pancakes?"   
'Be right there, make coffee _please_.'  
"Got it." I hung up and went to make some coffee and start the pancakes, eggs, and bacon. Fifteen minutes later Chibs came in the front door looking rumpled and sleepy. I hid my grin and handed him a cup of coffee.   
"Aila?"   
"Not up yet, I don't wake her until the food is done since she is clingy in the mornings." He nodded and stepped into my personal space.   
"Good morning." He said in a husky voice.  
"Uh morning." I said nervously and he chuckled as he took my face in his hands to kiss me. I tilted my head to give him better access and he boosted me up on the counter. He was slipping his hand under my shirt when Aila started to cry. "Welcome to parenthood _daddy_. Wanna go get her for me?" He nodded, helped me off the counter and went to get our daughter. They came back in a minute later and I smiled at how cute they looked together.  
"Where did you get a pink Reaper blanket?" He asked and I grimaced.   
"Uh Tara gave it to me the night she was born. She wanted me to have part of her daddy even though we weren't together." He nodded and put her in the highchair and smiled at me.   
"I like that. Thank you for inviting me over today, after last night I thought you'd make me stay away for a while." I just shook my head and gave him a plate of food.  
  
  
***** **One Year Later** *****  
  
  
"Daddy!" Aila yelled as Chibs scooped her up.   
"Hi baby girl!" He laughed as she gave him a wet kiss on the cheek. "Missed you today, were you good for mama?" She nodded and I peeked my head out of the bathroom.   
"She was good for me, once I told her that you were coming home today. She wants you to take her with you next time." He chuckled and came to kiss me hello.   
"I'd love to take you both, but knowing that you are here makes me come home faster." She gave him a look and he set her down so she could waddle away.  
"We missed you." I wrapped my arms around him and kissed his cheek as he watched her play.   
"I missed you too love, I couldn't wait to be back home with my _wife_." I smiled and nodded. We got married a month ago and he still loved calling me wife. He wanted to have another baby too but we weren't avidly trying. We stopped using protection and if it happened it happened. It had taken me a while to fully let him in again but once I had everything fell into place again and the hole in my heart that I had ignored got filled again. Chibs and Aila were my world and I cherished everyday with them. The club loved her and were all wrapped around her little fingers, Abel was her best friend and Tara and I got together once a week for a play date/ mom day. I really helped her come around to the club which made Jax unbelievably happy. All was well and for once my dreams were coming true which was just what my heart had been wanting.


End file.
